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On the eve of what could be the most contentious commissioner's race people in our small town, I've had phone call after phone call. What do I think is going to happen? What is my prediction? What does this mean? Why are people acting like this?

My answers? I don't know. I don't make predictions (usually). I don't know what this all means. Who knows why people are acting crazy.

What I do know is what I want for Oxford and every other town in America.

Oxford used to be uncomplicated. It was a small town filled with locals, "born here's, "and "come here's." Full timers and part timers all peopled our neighborhoods. They were very wealthy, wealthy, and middle class. Not so long ago, much of the population would be considered, by today's standards, poor. Black, White, Hispanic, European, and nationalities of all sorts lived and worked side by side. And yet, there was very little strife outside an occasional drunken brawl at Pope's Tavern or Pier Street.

There were families with children who would run and bike the streets, hike the shorelines, go fishing and swim in the Tred Avon River. They were safe here and enjoyed the unstructured play of being a kid. They were in little league or played "pick up" games at the church lot or on the ball field.

Our town administration included a Town Clerk who also lived here. She was a long-time resident of the town with her husband. She was "by the book" unless someone needed something because of an emergency/situation that might engender an easing of the rules. She was kind and cared about this town, the people, etc. You asked her a question; you got an answer. And, like the answer or not you could trust it was the truth. She was professional and if she didn't know the answer to your question, she'd find it and get back to you. She knew us by name and knew our families.

Our police chiefs were strong men who enforced the law and didn't care who you were or the money you had. If you were speeding, you got a ticket. Don't even think about driving drunk. The chiefs lived in town and looked out for all of us, taking calls at all hours of the night for all kinds of "emergencies."

Of course, our volunteer fire department were as they are now, men and women who answer calls at all hours of the day and night without thinking about who the call is for. They served everyone then and they still do.

Finally, our commissioners were people who also wanted what was best for the town. They were working people who understood what it was to be a part of the Oxford Community. Meetings were often raucous with them arguing points back and forth. We could ask them questions in town meetings without them hiding behind some ridiculous rule from Roberts Rules of Order that was meant to keep authorities from having to deal with the public. We could trust them. They weren't perfect but they represented ALL of us, not just some of us. They didn't play favorites.

They didn't have to agree with us, but they heard us and our ideas. They didn't look to a high paid lawyer to tell them what they could or could not say.

When meetings were over, we might see them on the street or the local hangout, talk about our lives, town issues and still be friends. Many worked side by side with town residents in boat yards or other businesses.

And that brings us to where we are now. I'm not going to go over all the events of the last year and a half. in Oxford. If you live here, you know what they are. If you don't go to our main page and search "Oxford."

What I want for Oxford....

I don't really want much for Oxford and its residents, at least not in the traditional sense of new buildings or fancy programs.

I want us to have truth, transparency and professionalism from our town administration. That means treating EACH citizen of the town with the same respect as anyone else, regardless of their social standing, the parties they attend, donations they have made, the volunteer committees they are on, or the size of their pocketbook. It means working WITH the citizens, not shutting them out. There should be no "have's" and "have not's" when it comes to how taxpayers are treated. The town should follow the rules not "work around" or ignore them in order to appease a small group of who consider themselves more important than regular citizens.

That means communication via a website, emails, or written communication that lets everyone have access to the same information including how their tax dollars are being spent, the salaries of their employees, the members of committees and opportunities, rules for those committees, and processes to apply and get appointed to those committees. Terms need to be listed and turnover on those committees needs to be often enough to encourage new people to become involved. No committee position should be a lifetime appointment. People need to know that there is a chance they can participate in the running of the town; be a part of making Oxford work. They need to know they can bring their ideas and expertise with them.

And we need to see monthly accounting of the finances and grant expenditures that is easily understood, not hidden behind acronyms or fuzzy explanations.

That means that commissioners allow ALL to speak in meetings and that they treat those speaking with courtesy, not name calling or ridicule. They should address questions when they can and if they can't find the answers direct staff to do so and get back to the person asking. Business should be done in the open with as few closed sessions as possible except for the most extreme matters. I want us to never hear a commissioner call a citizen a "liar" or another derogatory term and vice versa again.

I want that when it comes to big matters, annexation, changes in the charter or code, applications for big grants that alter the face of our town, services provided by our town, or saving the town from flooding, we all have a say and a clear understanding of what is going on via reports and presentations. Solutions need to be delivered in the order of severity, not just because a place is in a fashionable district or is considered "the first thing people see" when they enter town.

I want that it won't be seen as "divisive" to ask questions in Oxford anymore, even if it does require staff time to answer them. Asking questions is how we keep our government accountable. ALL of us have the right to ask questions without being labeled as malcontents or being accused of "weaponizing" the right to file public information act requests. If questions are being asked, it's because the town hasn't adequately provided answers. I want the people who live in this town to have a say in what goes on here, not a group of unelected "power brokers" who feel they are in charge.

Aside from the business of the town, I want to welcome visitors here without sacrificing the safety, quality of life, and rights of the people who live here. I want Oxford to be Oxford, not a cheap, commercialized imitation of other towns. I hope our businesses can thrive all year around, not just in the summer.

I want to live side by side with my neighbors respecting their rights and knowing I have the same respect from them regardless of which political candidate I support. How sad that people feel they must shun their neighbors for this reason.

Most of all, I want my friends and neighbors back. I don't want to feel that a campaign sign in my yard or the fact that I stood up at a meeting and asked a question or made a statement makes me an outcast or a bad person. I don't want to have people label social media posts about the accuracy of my water bill or my concerns with flooding as "political" in nature and therefore needing to be silenced, bullied or called "childish" by those who wish to preserve their "standing" with those in charge.

I hope people won't continue to be fearful of asking questions because the town administration will hold that against them and deny or hold up building permits or take other actions against them or their business.

It's sad when I hear about people not speaking to others because of their political views or the candidate they support. I hope that will end. I've made my decision and others have made theirs. That shouldn't make us enemies. I respect their decision and I expect them to respect mine. If we can't do that, we have forgotten what Oxford truly is.

None of these things will happen if we stop talking to each other. I don't mean having us all sit in a building while someone tells us how to meditate, or the dangers of "anger." That may work for some people, but we really need to sit down and TALK to each other, honestly, openly and with passion, compassion and feeling. It's the only way we can clear the air.

Sometimes we have to agree to disagree.

I'm going to continue to write my articles about our town regardless of who tries to intimidate me or who hates me for it. I'll point out the truth as I see it in the best way I can. It wasn't us who created the problems in our town, but it will be us who solves them.

Some people will hate this commentary, and some will appreciate it. It's what I have come to expect. Someone somewhere will write a nasty email about me accuse me of lying and call me names. So be it.

In the meantime, It's simple. I hope for all these things and more for Oxford and in a larger sense, our country. We need to get back to who and what we truly are or should be for the sake of our future.

I don't think that is too much to ask.

DON'T FORGET TO VOTE FOR COMMISSIONER OF OXFORD ON TUESDAY, JUNE 18TH!!!!

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